karla kwist
363 post s
5-May-2008
11:00 PM
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This will focus on traits of the Batterer, or the person who perpetrates the abuse. Abusers come from all professions, educational backgrounds, religious affiliations, sexual orientations, and ethnic backgrounds. They have a full range of physical descriptions.
Abusers DO have some characteristics in common. These include:
1. A belief in the use of violence in general: Men who batter do so because they can and it works. Abusive men have received the message that violence against women is acceptable behavior.
2. The use of defense mechanisms to justify abusive behaviors: Typically, the batterer does not accept responsibility for his actions. Batterers not only deny responsibility for their actions; they also often deny that any type of abusive behavior has taken place. They often tell the woman that she “made it all up.” He develops a number of defense mechanisms to explain why he batters.
a. Rationalization: I just wanted her to listen to me.
b. Denial-Minimizing: I only pushed her.
c. Denial-Claiming loss of control: A man can only take so much.
d. Blaming: If she/he hadn’t provoked me.
3. Pathological jealousy: The abusive partner is jealous of any relationships the woman has, including those with other men, women, children, and even pets. Anything that takes time away from him is seen as a threat. One of the greatest fears a batterer has is that his partner will abandon him. This manifests itself in extreme jealousy and possessiveness. He believes that if he can completely control her, she won’t leave.
4. Dual personality: Batterers typically present a different personality outside the home from the one they exhibit in the home. This dual personality keeps women tied to the relationship. The batterer does not always batter; many have periods when they can be very generous with their affection. The woman tries to be the “perfect” wife and mom in order to get the “nice” personality to emerge from the man.
Results of Lenore Walker’s Research
Leonore Walker, along with many others, estimate that as many as 50% of all women will be battering victims at some point in their lives (Page x, 1979).
Walker found throughout her research that women asked the question, “How can I recognize whether or not my man will beat me up? Or How do I stop from being battered?” Walker reported that she could not answer these questions. So, in class we will attempt to answer some of these questions.
Many of the women in Walker’s study asked the following questions: “Am I a battered woman if my husband only hits me once in a while? If he only threatens to hurt me and then takes away my car keys for punishment? If he calls me once an hour, am I battered?” In fact, few women Walker interviewed were absolutely positive they had been victims of DV. For many of the women, the myths of “battered women” (weak, low class women) was inconsistent with their own self-image.
The research showed the following similarities in women in DV relationships.
1. Initial Surprise: Most of the women stated that they were taken unaware by the violence demonstrated by their men. They could not have predicted that these men would have been so violent until after the initial incident occurred.
2. Unpredictability of acute battering incidents: Despite the number of times a battered woman went through the cycle of violence, she still could not predict exactly when an acute battering incident would occur.
3. Overwhelming jealousy: Batterers were jealous of other men, women friends, family, children, grandchildren, and jobs.
4. Unusual Sexuality: Battered women all reported unusual kinds of sexual behavior that their batterers expected in their relationships.
5. Concealment: Although women vividly recalled battering experiences, they frequently denied and concealed this information to protect their batterers.
6. Extreme Psychological Abuse: Almost all battered women reported severe verbal harassment and criticism.
7. Family Threat: As an important coercive technique, batters threatened to harm the families or close friends of the battered women.
8. Extraordinary terror through the use of weapons: Batters reportedly would frighten their women with terrorizing descriptions of how they would torture them.
9. Alcohol and Drug Use: Batterers frequently abuse when under the influence of alcohol or drugs. However, it is a MYTH that alcohol and drug use cause battering behavior. Research indicates that when a batterer quits drinking or using drugs, the battering continues. He will find something or someone else to blame for his behavior. Compiled By Dr. Shanyn Aysta Psy.D
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